One hour into Donald Trump’s phone call with Vladimir Putin on 18 March, a White House aide reported that the conversation was “going well”. The following hour, with the two leaders still talking, the head of Russia’s sovereign wealth fund, Kirill Dmitriev, announced that, as a result of the dialogue, the world had “become a much safer place today!”. Channelling the Trumpian vernacular, he pronounced the results: “Historic! Epic!” But when the call ended and the two sides released the details, it became clear that they had agreed to little of substance at all.