Canada announced this morning that it didn’t mind that the world’s unbiased media were going on and on about the imminent icy destruction of the USA, and completely ignoring its neighbour to the North.

“We’re basically fine, there’s no need to worry about us!” said some bloke, who is the current president or king, or whatever it is Canada has…

Canadian Mounted Policeman, Tom Canuk, said “Yes it’s cold here too, but as a nation we consist entirely of Mounties, lumberjacks, and grizzly bears, so we’re kind of used to it.